When I was right in the middle of my separation and divorce, I can remember that the absolute worst time for me was first thing in the morning. I would wake up, and for just a split second I would forget everything that had happened. For just an instant, life was okay. Then the second passed, and I realized that things were not okay.
Those moments have passed. That never happens anymore. When I wake up, from the very first second, I know that I am a divorced, single mother. It is really good to get to this point, because waking up is no longer an emotional hurdle to be crossed each morning. However, waking up alone is still hard.
Last night God gave me a little serendipity. I love that word. A serendipity is finding something valuable or delightful when you are not looking for it. Once again, last night, I was reading the Psalms. I came across the following passage.
How precious are your thoughts about me, O God.
They cannot be numbered!
I can’t even count them;
they outnumber the grains of sand!
And when I wake up,
You are still with me!
God reminded me that I never wake up alone. He is always with me. I am so glad, and that gives me so much comfort and hope. This morning when I woke up, that verse was the first thing that I thought about.
I cannot close, however, without saying something to my dear friends out there who are still married. I know when the passion has faded and you are dealing with the struggles and trials of day to day life, sometimes, you just don't like your spouse. Waking up to them may not give you the great joy that I am talking about here, especially if they look crazy and have morning breath. I get that. I have been there. Please don't take those precious moments with your spouses for granted. Thank God that you have them in your life. Smile at them, and tell them good morning. Maybe you can even forget about morning breath and give them a kiss. Every day is a gift. Start out your day remembering that and giving thanks for the one beside you.