I have heard many times that hate is a very strong word. Webster defines it as "intense hostility and aversion usually deriving from fear, anger, or sense of injury." I hate creepy crawly things. I think in this case, the word hate is very appropriate.
Early on in my Unplanned Journey, I found great satisfaction in learning how to use all the "man tools." All of our yard tools are top of the line and gas powered. They get the job done. When I learned how to use that heavy duty edger and blower, I was ecstatic. I would come in from doing the yards, filthy from head to toe, and have a great sense of accomplishment. It was amazing, and I thought to myself that I could do anything.
Then came time to work on the pools. Let me just say that I have neglected my pool lately, and now it looks like a lake rather than a pool. I carried the sample into my wonderful friends at Robert's Pools. Before I handed Robert, Jr. the sample, I said, "Okay, Robert, this water is a mess. But let me just say that I am a single parent, working full time, raising two teenage daughters and taking care of a house." He laughed and told me that I got a pass. Then he spent thirty minutes testing the water and giving me a list with fifteen things to do to get the pool back in shape.
The first item on the list was to clean out the skimmers. My friend gave me these wonderful little gadgets called a skimmer angel. It is a stick with a handle that attaches to the skimmer. They were great because you don't have to stick your hand down in the water to pull the basket out. Once again, I was faced with a post divorce challenge, and I conquered. Then came the cold weather. I guess all the little slimy creatures don't care for the cold water. Today when I opened up one of the skimmers, the angel was covered with spiders, even on the handle. The other skimmer had two frogs. Not just two frogs, but two frogs mating. This was one of my breaking points. It is crazy, but it is ridiculous things like this that sometimes just push one over the edge. I have taken on a lot of responsibilities as a result of becoming single, but I draw the line at handling mating frogs. So I did what any decent mother would do. I called for the girls and asked one of them to come take care of it. Lily came out, and we made a deal. She would handle the skimmer with the frogs if I would handle the one with the spiders. She doesn't mind the slimy creatures but hates spiders. I tackled mine first. I started by knocking the spiders off the handle with a stick. The only problem was that as quickly as I knocked them off, they crawled right back up. Finally, I just went for it. I knocked them off, jerked it out and threw it in the yard. Then it was time for Lily to break up the love fest. As she reached down to get the basket, she saw a spider hiding under the handle. She just couldn't do it, not with a spider around. So I reached down to get the basket. The frogs were not on the handle. They were actually on the top of the water. Everytime I would reach to get the basket, I would scream and let go. In my mind, I could just see those frogs jumping on me to "finish their business." But after ten minutes of arguing over who would get the basket and both of us balking right before grabbing it, Lily finally did it. I had knocked the spider off. She grabbed it and threw it into the yard. I am sure that the frogs were greatly disgruntled as their little romance by the pool was rudely interrupted. But we did it!
You know, it is times like these that you have the choice to do one of two things. I can get angry and bitter because I am having to deal with this, and it just is not fair. That is not the answer. Plenty of women who are not divorced have the same situations thrown on them. I think of my friends who have husbands who are deployed. Even worse, I think of my friends who have lost husbands. So getting angry just is not the solution. My other choice is to conquer the fear and laugh about it afterwards. We chose the second option! Now while I have conquered my fear for the moment, I am not ready to sign up for classes in entomology! But for the moment I can say that I conquered another hurdle in this crazy world of divorce, and we can have a great laugh.
So, as my friend would say, "It's all good...it ain't always nice...and sometimes it is even creepy and slimy, but it is all good!"